Knock Knock/So This Guy
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"So this guy" from KnockKnock.

RECITATIVE

So this guy who works in an aquarium
Get summoned by his boss
Who is looking very worried.

And she says to him,
"I've just walked by the dolphin tank,
And they're feeling very amorous -
They're doing all sort of things to each other.
And the trouble is in less than an hour,
We've got three busloads of second graders are coming.
We can't have them watching those naughty dolphins
Behaving as if they were in a porno flick.

"Now there is only thing that acts as an anti-aphrodisiac for dolphins,
And that's the meat of baby seagulls.
So I want you to go down to the seashores,
And catch us baby seagulls,
Put them in this bag,
And hurry on back.

"But be careful -
A lion escaped from the zoo this morning.
And although he was heavilly sedated,
He still just might be dangerous.
O.K., get going,
And make it snappy."

So the guy takes a shortcut through the forest to the seashore.
He fills the bag with baby seagulls.
And he's walking back to the forest,
When he sees lion,
And it is lying, across the path,
Directly in front of him.

It's too late to run away,
And the feline does seem so placid.
So summoning up all his courage,
He steps across the lion.

Nothing happens.
And so with much relief, the guy begins to resume his journey
When none of the sudden, the policeman steps aside out of the forest.
He graps the guy by the eye,
And says to him,
"You're under arrest!"
The guy can't beleave it. He says,
"Tell me officer, what's the charge?"
And the policeman says,

CHORALE

Transporting young gulls across the staid lion for immoral porpoises!
(Transporting young girls across the state line for immoral purposes!)

Transporting young gulls across the staid lion for immoral porpoises.
Transporting young gulls across the staid lion for immoral porpoises.
Transporting young gulls across the staid lion for immor-mor-mor-mor-moral porpoises.
Immoral immoral immoral porpoises.
Immoral immoral immoral porpoises.
Immoral immoral immoral porpoises.
Transporting young gulls across the staid lion for immoral porpoises.
Transporting young gulls across the staid lion for immoral porpoises.
Transporting young gulls across the staid lion for immoral porpoises.
Transporting young gulls across the staid lion for immoral porpoises.

Trans-trans-trans port-port-port
ing-ing-ing young-young-young
girls-girls-girls a-a-a
cross-cross-cross the-the-the
staid-staid-staid line-line-line
for-for-for im-im-mor-mor-ral-ral porpoises.

Transporting young gulls across the staid lion for immoral porpoises.
Transporting young gulls across the staid lion for immoral porpoises.
Transporting young gulls across the staid lion for immoral porpoises.
Transporting young gulls across the staid lion for immoral porpoises.

Transporting young gulls across the staid lion for immoral porpoises.


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